Lifestyle Columnist, Amanda Alexander

Today’s Word with Amanda

One of my favourite films is called Girls Trip. This movie is about love, honesty, loyalty and understanding shared among four girlfriends who hadn’t seen each other for five years. Ryan (one of the characters in the film) was observing a group of girlfriends laughing together and realised she missed her friends, Lisa, Dina and Sasha. Ryan was the keynote speaker at the Essence Festival in New Orleans. She decided that she would invite her girls on the trip to spend quality time together, they were also a known dance group called the ‘Flossy Possy’.

This film caused me to reflect on my friends. True friends are sacred, they see us for who we really are, love us unconditionally and are not afraid to challenge our behaviour and growth in life, they’re ‘our ride & die’ people. A true friend will never be jealous of you, will always support you, will not put up with your BS, and will never betray your confidence, even when you do have conflicts.

You will know when a person is really your friend, because they will not judge you, they’ll celebrate and cry with you, plus want your utmost best, if you have Christian friends they’ll uphold you in prayer. In Girls Trip Sasha was a tabloid celebrity journalist, Lisa a divorced mother and nurse and Dina was an office administrator and wild, but the common traits between them was love, loyalty, honesty and understanding, they were great at conflict resolution.

Ironically, I’ve my own ‘Flossy Possy’ they’re my ride & die who are also quick to challenge me when necessary. We’re definitely looking forward to our own Girls Trip! A word of caution, be very careful who you select to be in your ‘Flossy Possy’, because not everyone who smiles, laughs, eats and spends time with you is really for you, I had to learn this lesson the hard way. During COVID-19 I learnt a lot about myself and people, I realised that there were people in my circle for years who I thought were friends, but sadly that was not the case.

We should also ask ourselves whether we are being a true friend, because friendships are a two way relationship. We should even ask our friends whether there’s anything in us which could make us a better friend, some food for thought. So how do we screen out who is a true friend?

Friend screening questions: 

  1. Make a list of the people that are closest to you
  2. What was the most difficult thing that you’ve had to go through, and how did your friends support you?
  3. How did you both resolve personal conflict and did it give you more of an understanding of each other?
  4. What are the common traits you share, (list at least 5)
  5. Do you laugh or do you feel you’re walking on eggshells?

Your answers will reveal the status of these people in your life.

Until next time, remember you are beautiful and wonderfully made –

If you’d like to discuss this you may reach me on – With love Amanda x.

Amanda Alexander is the founder of Elect Lady Ministries & Amanda Alexander Productions All rights reserved ©
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