Lifestyle Columnist, Amanda Alexander
I know the word ‘Selfishan’ does not exist in the dictionary, but please indulge me because it’s the only word that I thought is apt for what I’m about to write.
On Sunday December 3rd, I did something completely out of character. It wasn’t something that was premeditated or anticipated and caught me by total surprise. I’m on the leadership and attend New Life Church based in Bishops Stortford, where I lead the women’s ministry and prayer on a Sunday morning.
My Pastor, Anderson Munhoz preached a message ‘Love God – Love People’, and part of his message included the story about the ‘Good Samaritan’ from Luke Chapter 10:v29:37. It’s a story of how a man was travelling on the road from Jerusalem to Jericho unfortunately, he was robbed, beaten, stripped and left on the road. A Priest and a Levite walked by and ignored him, yet, a Samaritan who was on unfriendly terms with the Jews at that time came to his aid.
The Samaritan took care of the man and carried him to an inn where he paid his bill to be nursed back to health, while listening to the message I became acutely aware of my own shortcoming concerning the treatment received from someone I dearly love and treasure in my heart.
The previous Sunday the individual told me some distressing news which crushed me, and instead of seeing their brokenness and pain all I could see was mine. I was hurt and very angry. They even shared the bad news they received with me, which was shocking to say the least. But instead of seeing and understanding their pain and trauma all I could see was my own. Even though they reached out the day after I ignored them for a few days. However, my heart was convicted on the 4th day, and I responded, to which they replied immediately.
I failed to see that like the man who was robbed, beaten, stripped left, the same thing had been done emotionally to the person in my life. Their lashing out at me was them being vulnerable, naked and unashamed. I was ignorant to this at the time, and continued to disregard them, as all I could think of was me, myself and that I hurt, (the unholy trinity). I even had the audacity to bleat to my Pastor, and in love he listened and encouraged me to love and pray. I went to God in prayer and again I prayed, but it was for my wants, my needs, and my desires, (the spirit of my’s – how disgusting and selfish is that). Needless to say, God dealt with me in a gentle, loving and non-condemning way, He knows my frame, that I’m made from dust with limited understanding.
Yesterday’s message cut me to the core of my being and with the gentle stirrings of the Holy Spirit, I was led to bare my heart before my church family and acknowledge my shortcomings. Disclaimer – There is no requirement at New Life Church for anyone to disclose their personal life before the congregation, I did that purely in obedience to God’s promptings in my spirit.
I stood in front of the congregation shaking as I shared my heart. Afterwards I was shocked at the loving responses I received from my brothers and sisters in the congregation. God used that message to teach me practical compassion, and this was laying down my life for my dearest friend. The fact that they felt comfortable with me to be naked and unashamed in their emotions, plus confide in me, proved they trusted me to love them back to health and keep their confidence is one of the highest demonstrations of love I’ve ever experienced for which I’m so grateful to God to be given that opportunity.
So my question to you today is…are you a Samaritan or a Selfishan? Become a Samaritan, have compassion for someone else’s plight, put yourself away and see how God will surprise you, as you live a life serving others first.
Was it hard being naked in front of my church family, yes it was…but I would never have experienced the depth of their love, had I not put down the me, myself and I syndrome.
Be a Samaritan to someone this Christmas not a Selfishan and watch how God will surprise you in 2023. May God bless, protect you, your family and community, have a ‘Happy Christmas and New Year’ and see you in 2024!
So until next year, remember you are beautiful and wonderfully made – With love Amanda x
Amanda Alexander is a Pastor, Teacher, TV Media Journalist
Founder of Female Dignity, Warrior Women, Amanda Alexander Productions. She serves on the leadership team of New Life Church in Bishops Stortford and is ministry coordinator for
Patrick’s Mission
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