Staff Writer Jade Gerald

Do the majority of relationship problems stem from being with the wrong person for you in the first place? Research suggests that the more things in common you and your partner have the better the relationship will be. But in many instances today meeting someone and getting into a relationship has become quite random, with many of us choosing a mate based solely on their looks alone.

Now nobody can deny that sexual attraction is important but is it smart to go for looks alone at the expense of everything else? Now if I’m being totally honest I’ve been guilty of this very act myself, having got with James out of sheer appreciation for mother natures handy work. But it became apparent early on that no matter what was said or done, James and I were never going to make it  happy ever after.

Was I partly to blame? Had I cheated myself out of happiness, sacrificed my chance of a stable loving relationship in order to be with a man who was physically beautiful but not much else.

The truth is all relationships require effort and compromise even the successful ones! But if we allow ourselves to be blindsided by beauty and never give ourselves time to really get to know someone before getting too serious. We’ll never know if they’re the kind of person who’ll give us back the effort and compromise we put in.

Beautiful man - Tyson Beckford

So what of James and I? For the last time my eyes searched his eyes for signs of love and as I stood there on the brink of saying goodbye, looking at his perfect teeth and perfect body I realised that looks again would never be enough.

What do you think?

Anyway while you think about this I’ve taken the liberty to list a Quick guide to successful dating:

  • Compatibility is an essential ingredient for relationship success
  • Principles of compatibility can be used to predict the outcome of a relationship
  • Taking a thoughtful approach to mate selection can be the difference between success and failure
  • It’s essential to allow a sufficient amount of time at the beginning of a relationship to explore compatibility before getting too serious
  • It’s smart not to base relationship choices on looks and chemistry alone
  • Not rushing into sex, living together and having children provides the space you need to really get to know someone
  • Your needs are what should drive your relationship choices
  • Being the best you can be, provides the foundation for attracting the love and life you desire

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