Protecting Yourself From Unhealthy Relationships

A couple of weeks ago I wrote an article titled ‘Detaching Yourself From Unhealthy Relationships’. At the time of writing I had no idea that I’d have to do a follow up on protecting yourself from these toxic connections. The realisation that I must also encourage my readers to do what is necessary to protect themselves, dawned following a series of horrible events which happened to me in the first week of February 2022. 

Initially I didn’t want to have Sarah (not her real name)  arrested and charged but to have medical care. However, when I heard that she appeared at my place of work unannounced this frightened me to no end. Thankfully I had already planned to have that particular evening off beforehand, and therefore did not encounter Sarah’s disgusting, sad and violent behaviour. My colleagues informed me that it was now necessary for me to take preventative and protective measures, as they seriously feared for my safety. Many times as Christians we believe that God will protect us and He does, but we must also remember that He places authorities like the Police and the Courts in the land for our safety, and it’s essential that we utilise them when necessary. 

Did I want to apply for an injunction to be placed on Sarah? No I certainly did not –  but I had to. I was hoping that she would accept medical help and leave me alone forever. Sarah’s decision to maintain her obsessive, violent behaviour towards me, (which is rather repulsive and very upsetting), left me no choice. What do you do when faced with violent behaviour from someone suffering from mental illness and sectioning them is not an option available to you? How do you protect yourself against their regular violent outbursts, while recognising all is not well with them. The choice I had to make was not easy, because there was no telling when Sarah would turn a corner and change for the better I had to go the injunction route. There was no indication or even a hint that she was trying to get better, she knew all the loopholes of getting around the authorities to avoid being arrested. 

In order to protect yourself you must put down your emotional connections to that person and ask yourself some serious questions like, who’s life is more important here? Is it right that I should be overly concerned for my safety? Is it fair that this person can hound me without incurring any consequences? If your answers are in favour of yourself, apply to your local County Court for an injunction for protection. Don’t allow your emotions or connection to this person prevent you from enjoying your God given life to the full. It’s hard, I know but you must do it for your peace of mind, and who knows, maybe your actions may help them take stock of their behaviour and make positive changes not only for themselves, but also for the benefit of society. 

Until next time, remember you are beautiful and wonderfully made – With love Amanda x                  

 Amanda Alexander is a Pastor, Teacher, TV Media Journalist

Founder of Female Dignity & Amanda Alexander Productions

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