Staff writer - Maria Costa
Here I was with my Mr.Caribbean, curled up together watching tv, my legs stretched out on to his lap. Arguably, a loving image which was reflective of many couples so why then, was I searching avidly for a brick wall so I could bang my head against it?
”NO, I swear, I’m not cheating on you!”
Safe to say that the honeymoon period with me and Mr.Caribbean was well and truly over; cue his irrational fears projected on to me full force. It was as if suddenly out of nowhere, he had decided that I was definitely, 100% going to betray him with another man.
At first he blamed my clothes, (apparently my attire which formerly excited him was now his number one threat), then it was my confidence, then my self assured nature and then finally, it was the way I walk (who knew a teeter could be so ominous).
Initially, I tried endlessly to convince him; being overly affectionate, staying in with him more, laughing a little harder at his jokes, telling him how gorgeous he was but my patience was wearing a bit thin and I was beginning to miss my friends. And hey, after 50 daily phonecalls and innumerable accusations, a girl gets kinda annoyed.
Just as I was about to cut him off cold turkey from my indulgence of him; I suddenly remembered something; his mother leaving him at the age of 14.
Damn my morals and caring side! Now I would have to delve a little deeper…
With much psychologist interest in to men and their mothers, Karen A.P.McGibbon writes that ”…Emotional immaturity is evident among some Caribbean men …where adults are still attached to parents (especially mothers)…”
It was evident that Mr.Caribbean had missed out on his relationship with his mother but that didn’t mean he still didn’t have the urge to be attached to a female in his life. Was I being perceived as the mother figure? * Gulp *
Or perhaps it was a simple case of being afraid to lose yet another person whom
Black man and mother
he cared about?
And so, armed with all of my evidence, we sat and we talked and we cried and we laughed;with sun rise providing our perfect backdrop, we experienced a trust-neissance.
Because what’s the use in love if you don’t have the words to back it up?
