Lifestyle Columnist, Amanda Alexander
Today’s Word with Amanda
What is Love
What is love? Baby don’t hurt me, remember that popular tune sung be ‘Haddaway in 1993’¹. The song relates love with not being hurt (in my humble opinion there’s pain in love, Jesus demonstrated that). We’ve read books, seen plays-films, bought merchandise, fought wars and peace in the name of love, but do we really know and understand what love is?
Gary Chapman in his fantastic book called ‘The five love Languages’² demonstrates that love is shown via five methods being acts of service, time, words of affirmation, physical touch and gifts. This amazing resource can help couples and families rebuild their lives where there has been brokenness and healing is needed for the wounded heart.
I believe that the perfect true definition of love is found in the bible 1 Corinthians 13³ . It describes love as patient, kind, does not envy-boastful, proud, dishonouring, selfish, easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs, not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Love always protects, trusts, hopes, perseveres, never fails and is the greatest gift.
Having come through an acrimonious divorce and betrayal I had nothing but hate and unforgiveness, my heart was as hard as nails, I had no interest in trusting anyone including myself. I existed in self-proclamation vows, and made the harsh decision that this is where I now stood within myself and society forever. I’m here to encourage you that I was wrong to view life and people through those embittered lenses, I was not living the love walk.
Photo courtesy Canva
In discovering what love truly is and that it’s not based on whether people treat me right or not, I had a responsibility towards God and man, to not owe man anything but love4 as described in 1 Corinthians 13³. Love does not mean allowing yourself to be treated as a doormat, boundaries must be set according to the nature of the relationship. Is it easy loving after betrayal, or when tragedy rips your life apart? No it isn’t. Learning to love from a pure heart is difficult; it takes time and cannot be rushed. One thing I can tell you is, living and loving according to the scripture is beautiful as I now live in peace and joy. Furthermore, I’m happy to say that having gone through the process of healing I give love from a pure heart and I’m able to receive it. There are different types of love, which I’ll discuss in future articles.
Questions to ask yourself.:
- Do I have a hidden motive for loving and if so what is it?
- Is there anything that is preventing me from loving God, myself and others from a pure heart?
- If I’m unwilling to give/show love is it because of a lack of trust?
Whatever is preventing you from giving or receiving love, if you cannot get to the root of the matter why not consider seeking professional help.
Until next time, remember you are beautiful and wonderfully made – If you’d like to discuss this you may reach me on https://www.facebook.com/caribbeanhookup/ – With love Amanda x.
Amanda Alexander is the founder of Elect Lady Ministries & Amanda Alexander Productions All rights reserved ©
Disclaimer: Readers are advised that the views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in the text belong solely to the author, and not necessarily to CaribDirect Multi-Media Ltd.
¹ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEXWRTEbj1I
² https://www.5lovelanguages.com/
3 https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20Corinthians%2013&version=NIV
4 https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans+13%3A8&version=KJV
