Staff Writer - Katrin Callender
I remember snickering at the expression as we huddled in a small classroom watching a film adaptation of Jane Austen’s Emma. Emma was being chided, yet again, for her behavior. For much of the two year period I spent preparing for A-levels, I often found myself wondering why I could write so well about that particular book. I later realized it was because I could identify with her.
It is so easy to fall prey to Pride. It sneaks up on us because there is a positive and a negative side to pride. It is healthy, and we are encouraged to feel some pride when we have done good work, or worked well. Yet we can find ourselves straddling or even crossing the line from the positive expression of pride to the negative, where we become either a nuisance to those around us, or worse, cruel as we think ourselves more important than everyone else, and place our needs ahead of others.
It is a long, long fall from a pedestal we build for ourselves. We climb high because we think we have a crowd of shoulders to stand upon and their love to ‘lift us up’, to quote a classic. If we – the last but most important line of defense- cannot see through our own delusion, there really isn’t anyone else who can get through to us. Not without a lot of time, a lot of work, and very likely, a lot of medication.
Proud Lady. Photo courtesy chakrabalancingproducts.com
I remember sitting at an event seething because someone – mind you, this someone was the reason for the event- did not speak with me. How dare anyone snub me? It could not be tolerated! I would not let it go without a severe tongue lashing! Yet, I did. Reason and the support of those around me, as well as my own conscience, would not let me punish someone who had done nothing wrong. What had caused my rage was not a real act of malice perpetrated against me, but rather a perceived one born out of my own enlarged ego. Instead of being upset with a loved one on a special occasion, I should have asked, how dare I attend a friend’s event with the idea that it would be all about me?
However, I had fallen into a trap where I felt that because I longed to see this person; had finally gotten the opportunity; navigated a path around my schedule in order to make it happen; that my friend should be grateful. I didn’t stop to think of what may have been done on this person’s end to make it possible for me to be there or for the fleeting moment of attention that I could have enjoyed had I not been consumed with rage and judging the quality of that friend’s love. I never even saw my own flaws until it was too late.
And this is why I urge you to examine your heart and your mind; search for any trace or indication of the negative side of pride. It is important that you know how special and wonderful you are. However, the moment you find that you are straddling that line, take a large dose of humility. The cost of merely feeling like you stand above the rest is too high, and it is often not as wonderful as the moments when you genuinely rise above all your negative thoughts, emotions and actions.
