Are You Confident or Arrogant?

In 2012 when I came back to the UK after working for a number of years in Atlanta, Georgia my personality was that of a church mouse. Due to insecurities within myself I didn’t know the difference between being confident and arrogant. I placed all people who were sure of themselves and spoke with a level of surety as being arrogant. I didn’t realise at the time that confidence and arrogance were very different. 

Nevertheless my opinion and fusion of both these traits together was totally wrong. It led to me misjudging people and consequently I lost some valuable friendships, due to my ignorance. When I started viewing myself in the wholesomeness of God, those ugly judgemental thought patterns left my spirit, soul and body. I realised that being confident was a godly and positive attribute, whereas being arrogant was an ugly and negative one. Confidence was given by God and arrogance was from the evil one. 

According to the Oxford Dictionary to be arrogant means “the behaviour of a person when they feel that they are more important than other people, and are rude to them or do not consider them” Whereas confidence means “A belief and an assurance in one’s own abilities (self-confidence) or the abilities of another”…² Even the bible warns us in Hebrews 10:35 “Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward”… 

We can see from the above interpretations and what the Bible commands us, that arrogant is inconsiderate, ill-favoured and rooted in self, whereby confidence is a God-given trait and thinks well of oneself and others. Confidence is rooted in love and wanting to help champion other’s causes, many times is not scared of allowing others to shine, and not think ill of their achievements. 

You may have come from a negative background, one filled with pain like I did and sincerely didn’t understand how such treatment gives you a warped, untrusting eye view of yourself and the society around you. Or, you may have come from a privileged environment where you see everyone beneath you, both of these ideologies and concepts are terrible and wrong which need to be changed right now. 

There’s a saying that ignorance is bliss…I’m here to dispel that myth and say no it isn’t –  it is foolish. The Bible says in Proverbs 1:5 “The wise will listen and increase learning…lets us be lifelong learners so that we don’t miss God’s best for our lives. 

You see, God has an amazing plan for your life, and only you can sabotage that and relationships if you don’t understand the difference between arrogance and confidence. Don’t be the person that everyone wants to avoid because your aroma is like Pepe the skunk rather than the smell of a beautiful rose. Don’t allow insecurity to roam in your heart and rob you of positive relationships one minute longer. Increase your confidence and soar, your garden will then be a beautiful array of flowers rather than filled with thorns and thistles. 

So until next time, remember you are beautiful and wonderfully made – With love Amanda x                  

 Amanda Alexander is a Pastor, Teacher, TV Media Journalist

Founder of Female Dignity, Warrior Women, Amanda Alexander Production. She serves on the leadership team of New Life Church in Bishops Stortford and ministry coordinator for Patrick’s Mission

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1. https://www.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com/definition/american_english/arrogance
2. https://www.oxfordreference.com/view/10.1093/oi/authority.20110803095631541